The Critic's Dish

Server of dry wines and bitter spices.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

New Jersey isn't THAT bad...

Hello again.

This episode of Project Runway, I felt, contained a disappointing challenge. I love a challenge where each and every designer makes their own outfit made out of clothing in which a few blow us away and a few make us cringe. This time, they had to make a garment out of garbage. Yet another craft project challenge just like episode one.

So the designers travel to New Jersey where Laura complains about how much the state sucks. HER STATEMENT IS NOT TRUE (but not entirely false either).


I LIVE IN NJ. IT IS A NICE PLACE TO LIVE (in certain areas). Okay, so the governor came out of the closet. Hei, who cares that he's gay anyway.

Anyway, I feel like showing you what NJ is really like:

Oh wait... how did that third pic get in there? Anyway. I'm just like you and you folks, with exception to Newark and maybe a few other radioactive towns and... well... counties.

Back on track. The designers enter a big warehouse in Newark that recycles the north's refuse. There, Tim tells them that they'll be designing from garbage. They rummage and sift and then leave for an artsy Angela store to buy some strings and things.

And now for the runway.

Uli: EXCELLENT design. Uli was one of the few designers to take garbage and weave it into a beautiful, plausible (from afar) looking fabric archetype. She draped this fabric as a short skirt and added a sweetheart-y top made out of paper. It looks like feasible fabric from here. Another spectacular showing from Uli.

Angela: Not so fabulous. I look at the design and see arts and crafts kindergarten work. This piece was just as papery as the Angela store that I made fun of earlier. I don't see why this wasn't in the bottom three this week... but hei I'll get to that later. Her design was random and arbitrary, the construction was unimpressive and papery, and pretty much it deserved to go back into the refuse of paper that the designers discarded and gave back TO the recycling company. Angela, you're all over the place here.

Robert: A very decent and laudable design by Robert. I was glad to see that he pulled himself out of this boring hump that he seemed to recede more and more into as the episodes dragged on. It was shouting, sexy, and sleek. I especially loved the signature bows that Robert put into the bust of the design. Great job, Robert.

Michael: YAY!!!!! This is a SECOND win for Michael (who is now the first to win two in the season!). The look was chic, sophisticated, and completely fashion forward. Michael, as the judges stated, has an incredible talent with the presentation of the design (hair... explanation). He truly seduces the audience into believing that he's a great designer. The boy is in the door of fashion for the long run, I see.

Jeffrey: This design is extremely Jeffrey. I must say that I'm getting slightly sick of the "beautiful ugly" (as said by Kors) that is Jeffrey. However, after detaching my own taste in design, I found that his piece was a stunning spectacle and held up well in the top three. And yes, the bodice was truly unbelievable. As Tim said, it's as if you want to get closer because you don't know what the fabric is. In addition, this was the only moving design on the runway! Kudos to Jeffrey!

Laura: Let's clear up ANY misconception of this design. This design should NOT be described as basic; morely classic. It was a classic piece styled like Courreges (which by now is VERY Laura already) and held up well with those of Jeff and Michael. Although I didn't get the meaning of "only nuts here," she still was able to achieve (what I believe to be) the first runway design that wasn't completely inficete. Laura, I hope you make it to the end, along with your volatile personality (tactless, however may it be).

Kayne: Eesh what a misstep! I've MET Amanda and never would I picture her looking this ridiculous. The design was bound for an elementary school play, and I bet it would be worn by some forest monster of some sort. It was scary and lumpy and the top completely didn't go with the bottom. However, I'm only thankful that Kayne didn't use that preposterous skirt that he crafted. Alison (and horrifyingly, Vincent) would've been an afterthought hadn't Kayne thrown out that horrendous skirt.

Vincent: Absolutely, absolutely appalling. I mean, what is he still doing on the f***ing show?!? This design, I felt, is the most poorly conceived design that I may have ever seen in the history of Project Runway. The challenge was to make garbage into fabulous. Pathetically, Vincent took strings and things and threw it onto a blank canvas. In end, it was oblique, ugly, and simply atrocious. (How come no one seems to be lambasting Vincent's design concepts?!? They are all weak!) Vincent, I count down the seconds until I'm relieved to see you auf'd. Alison was robbed.

Alison: Oh whatever it isn't that bad. Okay, so the design is not constructed to fit the zoftig Alexandra, but hei, it's editorial and interesting. The bubble skirt was one of the first that I've ever liked and the bodice was totally interesting. The deconstruction and asymmetry were fine and the corset was pretty cool. Tim even said that the design could've won, save the fat fit. Yes, the bow wasn't great and Minnie Mouse isn't too great an idea. But let me point out an inherent contradiction in Kors' thinking: He found that Kayne could construct clothing well so he's in. Yet, Alison was able to masterfully tailor that jacket during the dog challenge. Alison, you're a great designer, you shouldn't have been out, and I (along with all of America I'm sure) will miss you.

The judges' "matter of taste" is starting to become a bit of an issue on this show. Snap out of it, people.

See you next time for another critic's dish!


Blogger Andrew said...

Okay, I have to admit that IS mildly impressive for starting with garbage.
To Love, Honor and Dismay

7:06 AM  
Blogger Emily said...

couldn't agree with you's like we're sending brain waves to one another! LOL

9:21 PM  

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